Reflections of A Redbean Part Tres

Was intending to go swimming this afternoon and thus was happy enough when the rain stopped and the hot hot sun came out around 1. What i completely forgot about was the food – i ate XO Fish Head Hor Fun and after the meal realised that i can’t exercise until my system purges all the XO, else i’ll break out in hives.

Figures.

Anyway, i find it really invigorating the way God plans for people to come into one’s life. No i’m not talking romantically related things, just that it’s pretty amazing how people can know each other way way way back in their lives, lose contact and then get to know each other again after a number of years. (9.5, to be exact) It just reminds me that God is really in control of everything here, and i can’t wait to take time to meet up with people coming back for their hols and so on and so forth. The only problem that i might face is the RHOC meeting schedules and such…

Before i continue, i believe an explanation of my lack of presence on this digital space is in order. I’ve been pretty busy with RHOC recently, and having meetings that last into the wee hours of the morning (and sometimes continue futher), i’ve had very little rest as it is. On top of that, there’s plenty of props and other craft stuff to be made, so that means even less sleep. Even less sleep means that by the time i’m free to do anything, i’m pretty much too tired to do it. Blogging, (un)fortunately for all you readers out there in readerland, falls under that category. Hence the lack of updates.

But back to my train of thought – something that really struck me with the workload that we’ve been experiencing as a committee. Everyone complains here and there, about how they have other things to do, about how they dunno how to do, and excuses are given for not contributing – “i’m not artistically talented”, “I can’t dance like that because i’m very lembek one”, etc etc. Seriously, those kinda comments tick me off – is it really so hard just to lock your wrist? You have the discipline to wake up at 7am to play dota, but you can’t lock your wrist for 5 mins, like WTH man. Yet the test to this entire episode was to not join in all the bickering and complaining about how tired/stressed/lazy we are, the last one indirectly so. And in this i had a revelation – God told us in Philippians to “do everything without complaining” not just because it’s annoying, but think about what we do when we’re complaining – we complain when we are thinking of ourselves only. In essence, it’s just being plain selfish, putting yourself before others. If we genuinely put others before ourselves then we’d be thinking of the welfare of other people rather than complaining, granted that we all have our personal stuff to do.

That being said, i’m quite tired of human stupidity and utter inefficiency. The way people work here is like a dysfunctional football team – where ever the ball goes, the entire team moves along with it. Unfortuntately this team doesn’t have the “stamina” to last the entire “game” and most players just stand around looking at the “ball”. It’s bloody inefficient but everyone just stones around without thinking about what can be the more efficient way.

I realised i’d much prefer to be the one helping other people than to be the one watching other people do things. I don’t mean watching in the “eye power and don’t help” sense, but when i see something being inefficiently done by someone else i really have the urge to step in and suggest something or if absolutely necessary, take over it myself if possible. Thankfully at times i’m just too zoned to do anything, else i’ll be killing myself from doing all the work.

Hmm this is a random deviation, but it deserves to be put up – “the first few loaves and fish must be given to Him in trust”. For those who do know my story…the first few were given, but not necessarily in trust. I still fear that i will have to give more “loaves” and “fish” till God will do His miracles, but i guess i still have to trust that He has his plans, so who am i to interfere with them? 😀

Back to the main storyline, it’s been quite tough these days – having so many things to do, and so many other things i want to do, and so many people i want to meet, but just no time. Perhaps one day i’ll force out a break from somewhere, see if i can finish up work beforehand and get myself a free day or something, though i deem that highly unlikely. At times i do wonder why i really chose to do this – i thought it would be fun, though that isn’t to say that it’s not fun….just a lot more stress than i thought it would be that comes along with the fun quotient. I wish i had just a bit more time on my hands…maybe i should be spending more time praying.

Thank you folk, you’ve been a great audience. Please leave the place in a orderly and dignified manner, wipe your feet as you enter the house, ring the doorbell, drive safely, ensure that you’ve taken all your belongings before you leave, and don’t forget to tip the ushers on your way out…not necessarily in that order. 😉




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