And today marks the end of one module.  I’ve made the final submission for the assignment, even though i feel that it could have been better, but i didn’t know how else to improve it and the details of what i wanted to do were too much of a headache for me to handle now, especially with the rest of the work that i need to get back on track with.

I’ve got two modules left, and FYP, the latter being very much more of a worry, and the former more of a pain in the ass.  I could very well be continuing my FYP into a Master’s Degree, provided i get it, and that’s a little freaky; as if seeing my own name put on a publication sent to a journal that will eventually put it up on its archives wasn’t scary enough.  It felt totally weird, trust me on that, and i don’t think i’ll ever get used to it.  There’s been many hiccups to the whole thing along the way but i’m really really really grateful that the PhD student i work with has the mindset that we’re all in this to learn how to learn, and so each step which is commonly misconstrued as a mistake/accident is interpreted by him (and subsequently by my professor) as a chance to learn something new.  This is the kind of education that i’ve always thought of as the ideal, to teach someone how to learn, but yet when i’m in it i still feel apprehensive; it’s as if a lot depends on the person, and knowing my own lazy self, i fear for my own future 😀 This especially so with the upcoming presentation and official progress report that will be done during the holidays and will take place/be due in the second week of the new semester.

But before that come two more exams.  I’m not too thrilled about them, as mentioned in my previous post and i don’t think it will get any better as the days go by.

I know things always sound very gloomy when i’m thinking, but it’s hard to be crazily happy and yet realistically logical at the same time (and if i’m not wrong, the functions for those are situated on different hemispheres of the brain, so technically it’s not very probable that i’m able to do it).  I’m grateful for the people and person around me, and for my family for understanding and giving support, to push me harder when i need to be pushed and to make me smile when i needed cheering up.  These are the people that i will remember, and for those of you who persistently get on my nerves and play your “i don’t give a shit about anything else but my own personal entertainment and well-being” attitude about me, i may not say anything to you in the face, but i think i will very much try to forget that bunch of you.

I want my memories to be happy ones, that i might live happily.

And so it’s back to notes and papers and pens…

…i told you you’d be hearing from me before the exam ends 😀

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